Okay... so there are several albums or songs that have had a profound impact on me including Staind's Break the Cycle Album and the Bravery's song, Time Won't Let me Go. However, when I saw this blog assignment, I was weirded out, because very recently I was highly affected by an album, more particulary a certain song which helped me personally.
So I have been a heavy cigg. smokers for a few years now. I kind of wanted to quit but didn't have the motivation or true desire too. About 2 months ago, (in Feb.) they found out my dad had cancer in his upper right lymph note from smoking. This sort of motivated me to want to quit because it was a reality check that really hit home. However, even after he was digaonsed, I was still smoking but, with guilt and contemplation. Though motivation was starring me in the face I was still not 100% motivated to quit.
So after his surgery my dad spent a few weeks in the hospital I went home to see him. When driving back up to school from home I was on I-88 blasting a cd and jamming out to music (as usual).
That day I was listening to the new Rise Against Cd: Appeal to Reason (which I have probably out played). At this point I have already listened to this cd numerous times but on that particular day, the songs on the album sounded alot more clearer. They sounded different and certain lyrics popped out at me and were very heart-felt. I don't know if It was because on that day I was poundering and thinking about a lot of things that were going on in my life, worried about my dad, and sad because the anniversary of the shootings at NIU just passed.So when the song Kotov Syndrome by Rise Against came on, it effected me straight to the heart. Particulary there is a part of the song that states the following:
Spin out of control. Spin out of control. Try to recover but collide with each
other, We spin out of control. Somethings you don’t forgive somethings you don’t
forget. Sometimes the fate you suffer is so much worse than death. We’re way off
course now and we’redrifting out to sea. So cut the anchor on your heart to be
Why these lyrics stood out more on this partcular day and effected me, I still can't explain. All I know is that day I was alot more appreciative of life. (even though I thought I was already). And after that day I think that it helped me to gain some
perspectives on the gift of life and how easy we take the simple things for granted:
health, happiness, friends, work. I also felt sadness because there was simply so much bad news around me at this point that I felt depressed. In particular, "We're way off course now and we're drifting out to sea, so cut the anchor on your heart to be set free." made me stop and think about what I was doing to myself. With fate starring my dad in the face and with the anniversary of the shootings here at NIU, it reminded me of how precious life is and that I can't take it for granted anymore. That day was the last time I smoked a ciggarette. Some how that song struck a chord with me, and motivated me to want to quit. I thought about how as I smoked that ciggarete, I was choosing my fate where as other people in this world that face death sometimes dont have the chance nor ever get the chance to choose their fate. To say the least, ths made me reflect alot and ultimatly feel very selfish for making poor choices.
Other songs on the Rise Against album that have impacted me in some way include the songs, "Dirt Whispered", "Hairline Fracture," "Audience of one," and "Savior." It's hard to express how or why music impacts you mentally and emotionaly. The reassurnace comes when you end up seeing that band live and you and thousands of other strangers no longer become strangers because you all have one thing in common and somehow that artist and their music has brought all of you together. Personally, sometimes when find a certain song or band has impacted you in some profound way and you can't explain extactly word for word how your feeling, you just got to let it capture you and let the music rock you.